This Pride Month, Rainbow Families and Triple P have joined forces to help LGBTQ+ families navigate challenges that can come with raising kids in a rainbow family.

Kids from rainbow families are growing up in families built with intention, love and often a lot of hard work. Most of the time, life is just life, but there are situations that can catch kids off guard, and a bit of preparation can help them have the right words when they need them.

Tricky situations that can catch kids out

Some of the most common ones happen at school and daycare, like a Mother's Day card-making activity when your child has two dads, a family tree activity with only two branches, or an enrolment form that lists ‘mother and father’ with no other options. A child who doesn't have words ready for those times can end up feeling upset or embarrassed, even when no one meant any harm.

Outside of school, kids might get curly questions from other children who are just curious, a relative who still looks at families through a traditional lens, or a stranger who makes an assumption. These things can be easier to handle when a child is already prepared.

Talk about it before it comes up

One of the most useful things parents and carers can do is have open conversations about their family before these occasions pop up. Children who have their own words for their family can explain it to others comfortably and with pride if someone asks a question.

It doesn't have to be a big sit-down conversation, and it can happen in the car, over dinner, or while reading a book that features different kinds of families. The goal is just to give kids a chance to think about it by talking with their parents.

Some things worth talking through:

• What your family looks like, in their words, using simple, confident statements like "I have two mums" or "my dad is transgender" which are clear and easy to say.
• That families come in all kinds of shapes. When kids grow up knowing this, a question from a classmate is much less likely to throw them.
• Suggest some examples so they know what to say. When they have an answer ready, it makes a big difference. You might suggest something like: "My family looks a bit different to yours, but I'm pretty lucky, I've got two mums and a bonus dad." Or: "I have two dads and my birth mum." Find something that fits your family shape and let your child make it their own.
• Knowing it’s safe to talk questions through with you, especially when something catches them off guard.

The Triple P – Positive Parenting Program can help parents and carers strengthen their relationship with their child and learn how to problem-solve together in a way that builds both confidence and trust.

Talking with educators

Parents and carers in rainbow families often find themselves doing a bit of self-advocacy on their family's behalf, whether they planned to or not. A warm, clear conversation with a teacher or coordinator at the start of the year can help them know how to include your child’s family in classroom activities.

Something like, "Just to let you know, Sofia has two mums, so for Mother's Day activities it would be great if you could check in with us beforehand." You're not asking for anything special, just giving the educator the information they need to make the activities suitable for your child.

If a school or service isn't across inclusive practice yet, that conversation is still worth having, as Rainbow Families has resources to support parents and carers in those times.

Most educators genuinely want to help once they know what to look for.

You don't have to figure it out alone

Rainbow Families connects, supports and advocates for LGBTQ+ parents and carers across Australia with playgroups, social events for community connection and resources. They're there for families at every stage.

During Pride Month, take a moment to think about conversations you might want to have with your kids before they have to tackle any tough questions. A bit of preparation can help them navigate social situations when they’re out and about in the world, with confidence.

You can find more Rainbow Families resources here for early learning educators.

Learn more about positive parenting through Triple P’s online programs

Every parent can benefit from evidence-based strategies to support their child.

• For families of children aged 12 and under, Triple P Online can help.
• For support with teens, you could try Teen Triple P Online.
• For parents and carers of children with disability, you might be interested in Stepping Stones Triple P Online.
• For parents and carers of children experiencing anxiety, try Fear-Less Triple P Online.
• For strategies on how to create healthy screen time habits, check out Triple P Online: Children and Screens.